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Showing posts with the label Crazy

Decisions

I made the decision yesterday to end the relationship I was in. It was one of the harder decisions I've made for quite awhile. He is someone that I care about, but i'm not able to be the person that he needs. It's the first time in a long time I've let someone into my son's life. My son and his son got along great, he just asked about his son tonight and if they could hang out again. I had to tell my son I wasn't sure, it depends on a lot of things. I made a mistake in letting things happen to quickly because I was wrapped up in a relationship that I thought was going to be amazing. He brought me flowers and fixed my car. He told me he loved me, but I wasn't ready. I cared deeply, but love is such a hard word. Every man I've loved has managed to walk out of my life. I couldn't love that quickly. I cared deeply, but love - that's big for me. It's life changing big... I was falling in love. I couldn't say it back and it caused some tensio...

Ghosted

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Ghosting is this new thing where the person your talking to (or dating) just disappears because they are too chicken to say it's not working or they found a better option. It's a crap way to behave and thanks to technology it's a growing thing. I recently went on a couple dates with a guy. On our last date we went to Olive Garden. I'm pretty sure he thought we were going to a really classy place... so I think we're going to call this guy Never Ending Pasta. You'll never guess what he ordered. Anyway, Never Ending Pasta and I were supposed to go to the local hockey team game. They're in the playoffs and I got seats on the glass to have an amazing view of the game. The deal was I'd get the tickets and he'd get dinner before the game. I texted about midday, called in the early afternoon. No response. He ghosted me, never called or texted back. I went to the game, had a couple drinks (thought I was SUPER COOL drinking beer with a straw) with my amazi...

Knowing your worth...

I've spent a lot of my life not knowing or understanding my worth. Recently this plunge back into the dating scene has caused me to focus on what I am truly worth and what I am and am not, willing to put up with. I'm worth more than the last two guys I married ever treated me like and it managed to get me into this mind frame that those relationships were the best I was going to get. Wrong. I'm a good person, I volunteer - I'm active in my son's life. I'm not going to settle for someone less than what I want. I'm not in a hurry to fall in love with anyone. Heck, I'm not entirely sure I even know what love is when it comes to loving someone other than family. However, I'm slowly learning to fall in love with myself. Physically i'm not where I want to be, however I am really interested in joining the new Kickboxing gym coming in local to me. (Anyone else want to join with me?!) I'm so very thankful for my close friends who have helped support...

Winner Winner Chicken Dinner

My most recent texting conversation... I'm not even sure what to call this guy, but by the end I was definitely baiting him for my own entertainment purposes. There was a strange obsession with an App called WhatsApp, I refused to download it on my phone - here's how it went down... Can you please help do something?    What? I want you to download WhatsApp because it's easy to use.     Nope. Why?     I don't want it on my phone. Because I cannot continue like this     Well, I'm sorry to hear that you can't continue to text message on your phone. WhatsApp is easy to text and do video call.     Your cell phone can't text or do video call? What do you mean?     Never mind. So please let use that communicate     This isn't going to work. Good luck on your search for the perfect WhatsApp girl. …. oh here's where it gets good. My mom called and I ended up on the phone with her for 15 minut...

It's over, it's starting and it's confusing!

First of all, wonderful news - I'm officially divorced. I wasn't sure how I'd feel the day it happened, but in the end the amount of relief off of my shoulders was amazing. I talked to H2's newest wife a couple days leading up to the divorce, she's got herself in one heck of a bad situation. There is a part of me that wanted to help save her from the evilness that he is, but the other part of me knows that I can't get pulled back into the black abyss that is H2. I sent her some information on free legal aid in her county and told her that if she ever felt crazy and needed to talk I could help remind her she isn't the crazy one. Outside of that, I just can't. It bothered me, I felt like a bad person because of it - but I can't go down that road again. I'm over the mountain and happily skipping down the other side. I can't pull myself back up again. I've opted to leave the entire situation in the dust... no longer my circus or my monkeys. ...

Wreck the dress

I did it! I did the wreck the dress shoot, I went through a time where I thought for awhile I wasn't going to do it, but I did it and I'm quite pleased with myself. I have to admit, when I slipped that wedding dress back on it was a strange feeling. The thought went through my head, what the heck are you doing... but then we opened a bottle of wine and it was down hill from there. This was a lot of planning for me, I wanted it to be the perfect storm of amazingness. I ended up wearing a pair of booty shorts, thigh high stockings (with bows), a black scalloped tank top and knee high black boots under my dress, which was probably what took the most thought. We started off by taking sparkling wine and fizzing it into the air, all over me and the dress. It was my own personal celebration! We then moved on to purple and blue paint in condiment containers and gold spray paint. All over the dress, I even put it on the ground and rolled in it. After the paint we moved on to red wi...

A therapeudic photoshoot...

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That's right, you read it - I'm going to have a divorce party from H2. Never before have I wanted to celebrate something like a divorce, but this time a celebration needs to commence. Sh*t went down on the divorce front at the end of last week. It included a domestic lawsuit among other things. I'm out for blood - but not the revenge type. The you screwed with the wrong girl and it's about time you paid type. I talked to a photographer friend of mine about doing a wreck the dress photo shoot. I'm in the mood to go above and beyond anything else I've done. The goal is a self empowering, I am woman watch me roar shoot. I'm even thinking of wearing black lingerie under the dress that as things get trashed it starts to show. It's WAY edgy for me, because sexy isn't usually on the list of words that I'd use to describe myself, but I think the step outside of my box would be good for me. Paint, water and fire definitely need to be involved... that ...

Missed the relationship memo.... again

This weekend was a little crazy at our house. I wasn't supposed to have my kiddo (it's H1's weekend) but ended up having him so his dad could do some computer work. I will never pass up an opportunity to hang out with C, so we headed off to the Seattle Science Center with some good friends. Saturday evening I had a date scheduled with K.  We had been talking online for awhile, that moved to text messages and then we finally met in person. We were originally going to meet on Friday night, however Friday evening turned into a cluster of things I needed to get done before Saturday. He was irritated that Friday didn't happen, I can't blame him there. I just got busy and time got away from me. Anyway, Saturday we met for dinner at Sushi Zen - an excellent sushi spot in Mill Creek. We met about 7:30, I wore jeans, boots and a t-shirt because fancy was not on the agenda for me. He had assured me on the phone that he wasn't dressing up either - that was an understat...

A quick George Update

Evidently "Lose my number" - means find me on every social media site or dating site that you possibly can and keep emailing to George. I got a hit on Plenty of Fish this weekend from George....  Him : "I miss you already. I'm going to start a job in Everett and we should go on another date again soon" Me: "It's not going to happen George."  Thank goodness for the block button. and 90 people read my last blog... HOLY CRAP that is AWESOME!!

Let the crazy flag fly....

Oh. My. Goodness.... wait until you guys here about this one... I can't even think up an interesting name to call the guy. Lets just call him something boring, like George. George and I had plans on Saturday to go down to Brooklyn Brothers Pizza and hit up Funko. Since I had an minor oral surgery on Thursday and George had to work till one, we put off the date until Sunday. It was fine by me, I spent Saturday at home watching Netflix and doing laundry. Sunday rolled around and I put on a pair of jeans and a cute shirt, dressing up wasn't on my list of things to do. I wasn't sure what I thought of George, we had been talking for awhile and he seemed nice. I got to Brooklyn Brothers (not before shooting off a text to my wonderful neighbor letting her know where I was) and we grabbed a seat. The conversation was fine, nothing super interesting. I felt like I yammered on a bit more than usual, but it kept things going at least. The lunch was uneventful, he told me about his...